![]() ![]() THE PERNICIOUS POEM (F rom Attack of the Deranged Mutant Killer Monster Snow Goons, page 125) His mom never found out where he’d gone Cause Barney didn’t tell her There his dad spent his life, ![]() THE DAD WHO LIVED TO REGRET BEING MEAN TO HIS KID (From Yukon Ho!, page 101 / The Authoritative Calvin and Hobbes, page 108 / The Calvin and Hobbes Lazy Sunday Book, page 45)īarney shouted “No!” and ran. Thanks to my best friend, who saved the day. The monster never would’ve come if he had known!Īnd runs and runs and runs and runs away. Suddenly the monster knows I’m not alone! To sniff at smells (he must be dreaming), He lies snugled in the blankets, curled. We should have listened to him all along.” They’ll say, “We were too strict with him. He should have left another mess before he went.” We heard last night? You kept us both from sleep!”Īnd Mom will look at Dad, and nod assent. I guess tomorrow they’ll see their sad mistakes. The heebie-jeebies and these awful shakes. It chews kids up and sucks their bones, And dissolves inside its mouth their li’l heads! To devour helpless children in their beds. That grab and force you in its mighty jaws! ![]() Is drooling poison puddles on the ground.Ī fang gleams in the dark and murky gray! Makes a madd’ning drip-drip-dripping sound. I lay dripping sweat and now quite certainĭrops upon my short life’s precious play. A NAUSEOUS NOCTURE (From The Essential Calvin and Hobbes, introduction) ![]()
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